We are surrounded by envious people and sometimes we may even envy ourselves without knowing, that there are many ways to deal with it. And here are how to do so:
First of all, you should know that envy comes from feeling unloved, inferior, or slighted, it’s a feeling that any of us may experience if we treat ourselves baldly or hate ourselves.
The envious person is the one who thing that he doesn’t have anything good in his life or feels like a failure. This feeling works as a fuel that lights up the fire of envy.
In order to deal with those negative feelings, you should always remind yourself that you’re beautiful and deserve to be loved, and look at all the blessings that you have in your life. Don’t look at what others have and you don’t or it will only get worse.
I know you might say I don’t have anything good in my life, but that’s wrong, we have many great things to be thankful for. Being able to breathe, speak, and see are all things that we should be thankful for. Look at what you have, some people have wealth but don’t have family or health. Some have good health but don’t have wealth. You don’t know what other people went through to have that one thing you wish you had.
Always remind yourself that we are all struggling in this life and that you’re not alone, the difference is that some people are great at hiding their feelings even though they are breaking into pieces from the inside.
Life is hard, I won’t lie and say otherwise, but that’s how life is, just keep reminding yourself of the many good things you have in your life, and don’t look at anyone else. Although don’t listen to what people say about you because many of them want to destroy you to just feel happy seeing you fall apart.
How do you treat an envious person?
In my opinion, the key here is to not listen to them and avoid dealing with them, they are only envying you because they wish to have what you have. Just keep reminding yourself that there is nothing wrong with you, the problem is in the other person that is envying you.
They only want to destroy you and what you should do is not let them succeed, don’t doubt yourself or let them affect you or your self-confidence. If you don’t have anyone to support then help yourself out and don’t stop what you’re doing. And always remember people are jealous because they want what you have.
Ignore any bad thing people say about you don’t let them into your head, they are only saying mean comments because they envy you. If you can’t ignore the jealous person for any reason then have a direct conversation with them and talk about their behavior. Try to understand where all the hate and jealousy are coming from.
Show them that you are struggling in your life just like them because sometimes people can’t see the struggles of other people. Perhaps showing them that may help them see that they are not the only ones struggling.
If you can change your environment and stay away from the haters and negative comments then change it. This way they won’t be able to get to you.
You could also set boundaries between you and the envious person; you don’t have to keep listening to their bad mouth just to be polite. Letting them hurt you is not the answer here. Limit the time you spend with them and try not to talk about your accomplishment and life in front of them.
I know that many people like to share their success on their social media and there is nothing wrong with that but this will only make the envious people envy you more. Try your best not to share your life on social media.
What is the root cause of envy?
The main root cause of envy is that people tend to look at what other people have instead of looking at what they have. Comparing themselves with others and thinking that what other people have should be theirs.
Jealous people always see their selves as victims and blame others for their struggles. To be able to deal with an envious person you should find out where their envy is coming from. Find out what is feeding their jealousy and show them that they have many other things to focus on instead of only looking at what is missing.
How do Muslims deal with envy?
Muslims tend to remind themselves of the good things they have in their lives and the many blessings Allah gave them instead of looking at others and envying them.
They remind themselves that everything they have belongs to Allah and when they are given something or it is taken away from them it is only Allah’s will and Allah did this for a good reason.
Being envious in Islam means that the person is questioning Allah’s well and decision and as Muslims, they know that everything happens for a reason. Allah says in the Quran:
“Do they envy people for what Allah has given them of His bounty?”
Envy is a sin that leads to committing more sins and might even lead to hurting others or spreading rumors about them. The prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) said:
“Do not envy one another; do not hate one another; do not turn your back on one another (in discontent); (but) be slaves of Allah as brothers.” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
What are the dangers of envy?
Being envious leads to many bad things, like spreading rumors about the person and destroying his/her life. It might also lead to hurting the person physically or even killing him/her.
In Islam, it is said that envy erases good deeds. The prophet said: “Avoid being jealous. Know that jealousy wipes out thawabs just like fire wipes woods out; it sweeps them away.”
Additionally, Ibn Majah narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) said:
“Jealousy eats up thawabs just like fire eats up wood. And charity (sadaqah) sweeps faults away just like water extinguishes fire.”
Envy means to wish for what others have to be taken away from them and given to you. it doesn’t just hurt others emotionally but also physically.
Unlike the feeling of wanting to have a blessing like someone else, envious people want to take away the blessing from other people, and if they have the power to do so they will. It’s a destructive feeling that might destroy someone else’s life
Allah said in the Holy Quran:
“Indeed, the righteous will be in pleasure. On adorned couches, observing… You will recognize in their faces the radiance of pleasure. They will be given to drink [pure] wine [which was] sealed. The last of it is musk. So, for this let the competitors compete.” [Quran, 83:22-26]
And the prophet (Peace and blessing be upon him) said:
“Indeed, envy eats up good deeds just as fire consumes firewood.” [Ahmad]
The Quran mentioned many stories about envy and how it might destroy someone’s life. Like the story of the prophet Yusuf and his brothers. It shows us how jealousy led to hurting their brother.
“When they [i.e., the brothers of Yusuf] said: ‘Yusuf and his brother are more beloved to our father than we, while we are a clan. Indeed, our father is in clear error. Kill Yusuf or cast him out to [another] land; the countenance [i.e., attention] of your father will [then] be accessible to you, and you will be, after that, righteous people.’” [Qur’an, 12:8-9]
Also, the Quran told us about the story of Habil and Qabil, where one killed his brother out of envy.
Allah said in the holy Quran:
“And recite to them the story of Adam’s two sons, in truth, when they both offered a sacrifice [to Allah], and it was accepted by one of them but was not accepted by the other. Said [the latter]: ‘I will surely kill you.’ Said [the former]: ‘Indeed, Allah only accepts from the righteous [who fear him]. If you should raise your hand against me to kill me – I shall not raise my hand against you to kill you. Indeed, I fear Allah, Lord of the worlds.’… And his soul permitted to him the murder of his brother, so he killed him and became among the losers.” [Quran, 5:27-28 and 30]